Here I am, feeling a tad hopeless.
The house is dark save for the light over the kitchen table. The rain is falling and I can hear thunder rumbling in the distance. There’s a white cat warming my lap.
And I’m listening to a political podcast.
Sigh.
This isn’t a post about politics, don’t worry, but I’ve noticed that lately everything I listen to seems to be filled with despair.
A number of recent episodes of Fresh Air have been about climate change, and it’s totally freaking me out. There was a series on The Daily called Abortion Wars. And, of course, all political podcasts all the time seem to be filled with information that feels overwhelming and upsetting.
Add to that my favorite uplifting podcast. The Lively Show, has been on an unexplained hiatus for more than a month now. I rely on that show for a weekly dose of “all is well,” and I miss it quite a bit.
So it’s not that I’m truly feeling hopeless and worried about the downfall of myself and humanity, but I have to admit I’m not feeling as optimistic as I sometimes do.
But I have the tools to turn the hope back on, and I want to share them, both as a reminder to myself and in case it helps you in your life.
What to do when you feel hopeless
#1 Give yourself permission to feel hopeless
Sometimes we humans feel kinda bad. The stories and negative thoughts in our head can get a little out of control. We can lose touch with what’s important. We get lost. And all of this is completely, perfectly normal. We’re here to learn. We’re here to grow. We’re here to figure out how to separate from all of the mental junk. We’re also here to learn to accept the present moment, and when you give yourself permission to just feel blah, really and truly, it can go a long way. You don’t have to be happy and hopeful all the time. (Note: If you’re suffering from depression, please get help. Feeling truly hopeless for long periods of time is not what I’m speaking about in this post.)
#2 Tune into the quiet voice inside you.
When I go into my bedroom at night, I usually read for a few minutes (I’m currently reading Dr. Joe Dispenza’s Becoming Supernatural, but that book is dense, y’all, so I only read a few pages at a time) and either write to my intuition for a bit or meditate (but hopefully I have time for both).Getting still helps SO MUCH. And I just want to put this out there: It’s BS that you can’t meditate, because you totally can, it just takes practice, and it’s BS that you don’t have an intuition or inner voice, because you totally do, you just need to practice listening to it.
These rituals will connect you back to the knowing part of you that senses all is well. I’m not a religious person, but I’m spiritual and certainly believe in things beyond our current dimension and understanding, and this helps me feel like, no matter what is happening in my life or on earth, all is well, really and truly. Meditating and going beyond my mind, or writing to my intuition and just breathing deeply make me feel hopeful again.
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#3 Identify what’s making you feel hopeless and stop engaging with it!
I admit this can be hard. It’s sometimes pretty simple to figure out what’s making you feel hopeless, right? There’s some external thing going on in your life and it’s causing you to have negative thoughts about yourself and your future. It can be listening to the news or negatively tinged podcasts, it can be someone in your life giving you a hard time, it can be something going on with your kid. Regardless of what it is, it’s your mind that’s spinning what’s happening into a story about how things will never get better. Of course they’ll get better, life is a series of up and down waves. That’s why “This too shall pass” is a famous quote.
Once you’ve figured out what is making you feel hopeless, stop engaging with it. Since it’s the podcasts and news that are making me feel down and out, I’m going to stop listening to them (okay, I’m going to finish the one I’m on right now, but then I’ll stop). I already searched around this morning for a list of inspiring podcasts, because I know I need something that feels good.
What can you do to let go of the hopeless feelings you have? Can you stop watching the news? Stop following that person on Instagram who makes you feel bad about yourself? Can you find a way to be grateful for your job instead of feeling hopeless about the future of your career? Find a way to disengage and commit to it.
#4 Identify what makes you feel hopeful and start doing more of it.
I already hinted at this above. Instead of negative podcasts, positive ones. Instead of dread and doubt, gratitude. It’s helpful to identify things that make you feel good when you already feel good, so that you have some ideas in your back pocket for when you’re feeling down.
If reading beachy chick lit fiction makes you feel good, read it! If getting off of social media makes you feel better about the state of the world, get off! If protesting or getting politically involved genuinely makes you feel hopeful about the future, do it!
This is up to you. You get to choose how you feel and how you act. Do you want to succumb to hopelessness? I know I don’t. I hope you’ll step into the light with me.
I talked a lot about tuning into that quiet voice inside you in this post. This guide will get you started on learning to do just that.
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