Ever wonder how to deal with anxiety?
I have. And sometimes it’s felt really, really awful and like it was taking over my life. Like it’s creeping into every corner of my world.
I can feel it physically, like when it shows up as a pain in my chest, or a tingling somewhere.
I can feel it emotionally, like when it makes me feel jittery and unfocused.
I can feel it when it takes over and wakes me in the night with a panic attack.
But I’ve also seen the light. I’ve seen that I can deal with it, that it can get better, and that I can get on with my life.
How I am qualified to tell you how to deal with anxiety?
Because I have, indeed, been able to improve my anxiety levels. The thing that really helped me is realizing how my mind is the thing causing anxiety. My thoughts. There’s nothing “wrong” with me. And my thoughts are something I can control.
Anxiety, for me, is usually caused by the mind in my living in the future.
That’s what causes that low level unease I feel all the damn time. Even if I’m not conscious of it, there’s a subtle program running in the background: I don’t have enough time. I can’t get everything done. I’ll never make enough money. I’m not good enough. I can’t reach enough people.
No wonder I’m anxious!! If someone was whispering that BS in your ear 24/7, you’d feel pretty bad, too! (And perhaps this exact same thing is happening to you).
What you can do to reduce anxiety right now
#1 KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS
Seriously. This helped me SO much. Your thoughts are running in the background all day long, but they are NOT you. Do you think your big toe is you? No, you think it’s part of you, and you know all humans have them, but you don’t identify with it.
Your mind/thoughts are the same thing. Sure, they’re part of you, but they’re not you. They’re not the real you, the essential you. And I hate to break it to you, but all minds pretty much do the same thing: Worry about the future and create anxiety or fret about the past and make you feel depressed.
Once you know that the thoughts aren’t you, you can begin to separate from them and not believe the anxiety-inducing thoughts they’re telling you.
#2 ACKNOWLEDGE THAT YOU’RE ANXIOUS
This might sound silly, like “of course I know I’m anxious! I’m anxious!” But for me, slowing down and stopping to look at the anxiety gives me some distance from it. “Oh, okay, I see I’m experiencing anxiety right now.” I think that simple acknowledgment allows me to see that I’m not the anxious thought, I’m the observer of it.
Basically, if you can see the anxiety and where it’s coming from, you can see that you’re separate from it and bigger and stronger than it.
#3 REMIND YOURSELF THAT YOU’RE NOT THE ANXIETY
I’ve had to use this lately and it really, really helps.
A few months ago we were heading to the beach and I got extremely anxious. I’d eaten something out of the ordinary for me, and I was worried I’d have an allergic reaction to it. (Sigh, I once got hives and don’t know what caused it and it’s freaked me out since then.
This is the perfect example of the mind making something huge and ridiculous when it doesn’t need to be. I got seriously worked up, but finally, FINALLY I stepped out of believing what my mind was saying and told it, “I don’t believe you.” I separated from the anxiety. I also said, “I see you, but I am not you.” I’ve used this a few times since then and oh my goodness, it’s so helpful. For this to really work you need to understand that you are not your thoughts, but once you do, it’s so, so helpful.
#4 COME BACK TO THE PRESENT MOMENT
I do this by coming back into my body (and thus stepping away from my mind and it’s incessant chatter). Try taking deep breaths, meditating, paying attention to your heart beat, or using your senses to notice what’s going on around you (I see an orange cat, I see a rectangular sign, I feel a warm breeze, I taste a salty potato chip).
Here’s my favorite way to get out of my (anxiety-inducing mind) and into my body: Close your eyes. Now hold up your hands. How do you know you still have hands? Well, you can actually feel them, and feel the energy moving through them. Being able to feel that energy flowing inside you brings you right into the present moment and into a state of calm. Try it.
#5 SPEAK TO YOURSELF WITH KINDNESS
I remember when I realized I could talk myself down from panic and anxiety. I was in the middle of a freak out when I realized that I could act as my own soothing, calm, kind friend.
Here are some things you can tell yourself when you’re panicking:
- “You’ve gotten through this before and you’ll get through this”
- “You are doing a great job, just take some deep breaths”
- “I love you and all is well”
- “Get up, take a walk, look at the trees. You can get through this”
At your core you are a conscious presence witnessing the anxiety, not the person experiencing the anxiety. You can separate from it and soothe yourself. Learning this changed my life. (If you want to learn more about speaking kindly to yourself, check out my 30 Day Self Love Affirmations Course)
#6 EXPLORE YOUR CREATIVITY
Adding creativity back into my life has reduced my anxiety and helped me spend more time in a flow state.
Doing something creative helps you achieve lots of other thing on this list—it brings you into the present moment, keeps your mind from going all over the place, and can help you see that you’re not the anxiety.
In other words, it facilitates almost all of the other suggestions on this list.
If you don’t have a creative practice yet, I’ve got something just for you!