This week I said something that I wish I hadn’t said, and afterwards I spent quite a few painful moments berating myself over it. I quickly realized, though, that being cruel to myself is like being cruel to a kitten, or a flower, or my daughter.
If you wouldn’t call your best friend or partner or neighbor the things you’re calling yourself, you shouldn’t call yourself them, either.
I don’t think it’s ever a good idea to be cruel to yourself, but it’s especially bad if you’re trying to pursue something creative. Cruelty kills creativity.
My Hippy-Dippy Reasons for Self-Kindness
We are all part of one consciousness, growing and learning and expanding. When you are kind to yourself, you’re being kind to everyone. When you are unkind to yourself, it shrinks you down and dulls your light.
When you are kind to yourself, you’re free to express yourself and let your creative soul shine through.
If it helps, imagine the part that is saying the hurtful things as a separate entity, a scared being who is doing its best. Another, larger, more connected part of you can take a breath, then comfort that scared part. Offer it a hug, or a grilled cheese sandwich. Tell it thank you for trying to help (because that’s what it thinks it’s doing), and then offer that part of you rest.
Being kind to yourself feels so good. There is no downside, but there are three upsides.
3 Ways Being Kind to Yourself will Fuel Creativity
1. When you’re kind, you’re calm, and when you’re calm, you’re creative.
Being gentle with yourself feels good. It lowers your stress levels. It lets your shoulders drop a few notches. Once you feel those calm vibes flowing, ideas will flow.
2. Self-kindness means you’ll be gentle with yourself when you fail.
When you’re pursuing anything creative, there will be failures, both big and small. You’ll get a rejection letter from a publisher, or your creative idea at work will be rejected. You’ll sell zero paintings, you’ll get paint all over your clothes, someone on the internet will be mean to you.
When you have the right mindset, though, one in which you talk yourself up, rather than smushing yourself down, you’ll be happier. And bonus: You’ll be more likely to try again, because you’re on your side.
3. You’ll be able to more easily tap into your creative superpower, AKA your intuition.
You can’t hear your intuition when your mind is full of racing thoughts, and when you’re consistently practicing being kind to yourself, that runaway train that is the mind is likely to be quieter. And when you’re quiet, your intuition can enter the building, and that will increase your creativity!